Monday, January 22, 2007


Sunday, January 21, 2007

Our National Health

To: Mark Mattson
National Institute on Aging

I am currently digesting the news that, according to your research, skipping meals might have health benefits. I would tend to agree, but only up to a point. I imagine, for example, that if you skipped too many meals, for example, a few dozen in a row or more, that you might risk exposing yourself to certain other health concerns, viz., death and related complications. Would you agree?

Saturday, January 20, 2007

No Rules at All?

To: Outback Steakhouse

Your "No Rules - Just Right" ad campaign has raised more than a few eyebrows in my social circle. I know that the idea of a restaurant with "no rules" may seem like an exciting and youthfully enthusiastic notion to some. But my own concern is with the handling of the meat. For example, is it really the best idea to have "no rules" whatsoever when it comes to the preparation and cooking of meat? I imagine the consequences of this could be, in a gastronomical sense, quite hazardous, possibly even deadly in certain cases.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Internment Camps Revisited

To: Michelle Malkin
Re: In Defense of Internment

I noticed that your book In Defense of Internment makes an extremely provocative case that the racial profiling of Japanese-Americans during WWII, including their evacuation, relocation, and internment in camps, was not only justified but also has lessons for our current conflict with Islam. What I don't understand, however, is how locking up all these Japanese-Americans today would help our cause. For example, aren't there many more Japanese-Americans living in the United States today than during WWII, and so wouldn't the logistics of hauling them off prove more difficult? Second problem: Wouldn't this move anger the Japanese government? Third - and I have to be honest with you on this one - I don't quite see how locking up the Japanese would help us fight Al Qaeda. Any illumination on this subject you can provide would be deeply appreciated.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

This is Beer

To: Anheuser Busch, Inc.

Your latest Bud ad campaign is a stunner. It has George Clooney announcing: "This is Budweiser. This is beer." Is this really the best thing Bud can say about itself? This is beer. OK, so it's beer. We know that. We know it's beer. You have the legal right to call your product beer. A grateful nation congratulates you. We accept the inevitable truth of your statement. You sell beer. We appreciate your modesty. Congratulations.